2nd post.

its almost a year back since i last blogged.

dear blog,

im feeling real down again. it was the exact same feeling some 3 years back. ive never wanted things to happen this way. everything was so beautiful its like a picture perfect painting; colorful, vibrant, magical.

then things start to go wrong. age, security, me being a bartender, me going nus, everything. but is it really me? i was termed cunning, evil, egoistic, a flirt. im not sure about cunning and evil, but if i really had ego, let me ask u: what is ego when its something when uve already trampled so hard upon.

perhaps, i shouldnt even have commited to u. when u asked me, "is it because u got what u wanted, thats why ur so cold to me now?" i should have replied yes. why did i spend my night pondering over the question u posed on me. and after everything, when i started to devote not just physically but emotionally to u, u told me that everything is not right. we are not suitable. we are not meant for each other. im too young for u. i do not give u a sense of security. i flirt with girls. i am cunning because i approached ur friend to talk about us.

im not going to try anymore.

now to sharon.

although no one is going to read this, and i know u will not be reading this, thanks really a whole lot. for everything. for ur macaroons, for scooping ice cream for me, for cheering me up when im down, for telling me off when im in a bad temper so that i can change for the better. i really appreciate u. u really know how to fix a broken heart. well, at least, im healing and im moving on, slowly but surely. thank you, princess sharon. :)